The Meaning of Personal Values
Direct Your Life
Personal values are foundational beliefs that drive your behavior, influence your decisions, and shape your interactions. They are the essence of who you are and what you stand for.
Personal values are ethical principles that form your internal beliefs about what is good and what is important to you. They inform your viewpoints, and outlook on life.
They define you as a person, guide you in your decision making, and help determine how to conduct yourself. You manifest them in your personality traits, the way you behave alone, and with others.
Table of Contents
Why Is It Important to Have Well-Defined Values?
Your values define you and keep you grounded and stable. They help you in making wise decisions, big and small. There are not many things more important.
WHAT PERSONAL VALUES DO
Personal Values Define Your Moral Compass
In a world brimming with opportunities and challenges, personal values can be your moral map, guiding you through life’s twists and turns.
Personal values provide you with your understanding of what is right and what is wrong, your moral compass. Personal values instructs your conscience, which speaks to you, whether it condemns or praises you.
Does it bother you if you don’t tell the truth? If so, you have a guilty conscience. Your conscience acts as your judge to keep your behaviors aligned to your personal values.
Your personal values help you form your GOALS. Yes, values determine your goals and where you are going in life. If your goals don’t agree with your values, you will go nowhere, or you will be very unhappy.
Personal values also help you:
Make Decisions. Clarifying your values simplifies choices and helps you make decisions that align with your true self.
Build Relationships. Shared values strengthen relationships between people and foster trust and understanding.
Navigate Challenges: When faced with difficulties, values provide a sense of direction and resilience.
ARE YOUR PERSONAL VALUES TRULY YOUR OWN?
Is it really possible to define your personal values? Of course, but few take the time for conscious reflection to do so.
Most of our personal values have developed unconsciously and automatically. Many of them are not truly ‘ours.’
They are a conglomerate of what was impressed upon us in our formative years, modified by our own experiences as we progress through life.
Negative, hurtful experiences can lead a person to adopt those same values that were used against him/her.
On the other hand these bad experiences can cause a person to reject those hurt-causing values. Values of this nature are often far more consciously determined
Some negative values that cause damage to the self or to another person include:
Greed
Jealousy
Envy
Vengeance
Emotion over Reason
Impetuousness
Anger
Hate
Getting Even
Pride
Love of Ease
Selfishness
There are other values that are somewhat neutral. They can be used constructively or destructively. Some neutral values are:
Ambition
Strength
Silence
Cleverness
Humor
Candor
Fame
Risk
Boldness
Toughness
Carefulness
Fun
VALUES THAT INFLUENCE LIFE GOALS
What are the values that you might think will influence your goals in life?
Read over this list of constructive values to start your mind thinking. There are quite a few to consider, and these are just a few.
Dignity
Transparency
Compassion
Gratitude
Kindness
Peace
Wisdom
Love
Honesty
Forgiveness
Freedom
Respect for life
Self-control
Courage
Humility
Equality
Acceptance
Kindness
Generosity
Integrity
Resilience
Remember, the essence of any value resides in how the value is used in life circumstances.
STEPS TO DISCOVER YOUR VALUES
Follow the steps below to discover your own values.
1. Identify Core Beliefs
Think about what truly matters to you. What principles do you hold dear? Some common values include integrity, compassion, innovation, and adventure. Make a list of values that resonate with you. Use the three lists included above, positive, negative and neutral.
Think about why your chose those values. Then think about how they affect your life. There may be values that you do not hold strongly, but would like to, and need to work on.
Be brutally honest with yourself. Any one of us can have values that we don’t even realize. For example, I might be more selfish than I like to think.
So values are tricky, and they hold power. It is probably wise to mull over your values often.
One way to judge a value is to determine if it is constructive, and whether it is based in reality. Ask yourself if it is possible to use this value for your own personal growth.
2 Be aware of your actions and their reasons.
You encounter many situations every day that cause you to react or say something. Don’t just dive into them immediately with an unconscious response.
Momentarily, stand back and assess what best to do for a particular circumstance. You have the intelligence, so use it and not your instinct.
Is it wise to think, “Go with your heart” or “If you feel it’s right, then do it”? No, because this line of thinking can prove to be treacherous. You are acting with your emotions, and that is unreliable. It is actually not thinking, but non-thinking.
On the other hand, your values are the products of your thinking ability, of your reasoning power. Do what your values tell you, and not what your primitive, impulsive gut instinct is telling you.
3 Understand your motivation.
What motivates you to tell the truth? Is it to continue the values which your parents taught you from childhood? Or do you get self-satisfaction when you’re honest in all your dealings? When you understand the reason why you act the way you do, then your values become more structured and clearer to you.
4 Train your conscience.
The feeling of guilt tells you that your conscience is sensitive to your wrongdoing. Otherwise, you will not feel anything when you lie, or commit an unkind word or action, or act in a proud arrogant way. It’s a sign that urges you to correct the mistake that you made. So, listen to your conscience. When you do, you further develop ideal values and traits.
5 Evaluate the consequences.
You need to learn to identify your value options. To act with courage or cowardice, to act nobly or dishonestly. Think of your options. Then weigh the pros and cons of your possible decisions. Just knowing right from wrong is not enough. You need to follow through the idea with action. It’s important that you understand and appreciate the benefits of acting on your values and the consequences of not doing so.
6. Reflect on Your Experiences
Reflect on significant experiences in your life. Consider moments of joy, pride, and fulfillment, as well as times of struggle and disappointment. What values were at play in these situations?
When you reflect on the mistakes of your youth, you learn life lessons. Why? You will have been in a situation where you made a poor choice and suffered the consequences.
Were you grounded by your parents for being late? In the same manner, as an adult, when you’re late reporting to your job, you must accept the consequences of your actions.Your boss might be angry or dissatisfied.
If tardiness is habitual, you might lose your job in the end. You can resolve to improve yourself by getting up earlier (use an alarm clock) and better manage your time so you won’t need to rush.
The values you’re nurturing are punctuality, time-management, and respect for others.
As you go through life, your experiences, good and bad, can help you form new important values.
7. Choose Your Values
Pick out the constructive values you want to adopt from the lists above; choose those that seem personal to you. Add other values that come to your mind.
8. Define Each Value That You Choose.
Clearly define what each value means to you. This is expecially important for neutral values. For example, if one of your values is “growth,” does it mean personal development, learning new skills, or pushing yourself beyond your comfort zone?
9. Prioritize Your Values
Narrow down your list to the values that are most important to you. This can be challenging, but it’s crucial to focus on your top values to avoid feeling overwhelmed.
CHANGING VALUES
It is sometimes said that social values are changing with time. A society may adopt new values or drop others.
It is up to you, and you alone, to decide which of your culture’s values you want to adopt as your own in any given period of time. You must decide whether a value is constructive or destructive and whether it is based in reality and truth.
What is the possibility that your values will change? Will they change with experience and other influences?
For example, if you become monetarily successful, will you disregard or minimize some of your values such as courage, resiliency and humility, which helped get you where you are now?
The answer lies within you. But remember that a strong person possesses deep-rooted moral values that don’t shift here and there with the sands of time.
JUST THE BEGINNING
Defining your values is just the beginning. To truly benefit from this process, you need to incorporate the values you choose into your daily life. Here are some tips to keep in mind often:
Align Actions with Values
Evaluate your daily actions and decisions. Are they in harmony with your defined values? Strive to live in a way that reflects your beliefs. This alignment fosters authenticity and contentment.
Set Intentions: Start your day with a focus on living according to your values.
Make Value-Based Decisions: Use your values as a guide when making choices, big or small.
Reflect Regularly: Periodically review your values and assess whether your actions align with them. Adjust as necessary.
Conclusion
Defining personal values is a journey of self-discovery that leads to a deeper understanding of yourself and your purpose. By identifying and prioritizing your values, you can live a more authentic and fulfilling life.
Embrace your values, and let them guide you to a brighter, more meaningful future.
